By D. Jefferson Bean / Staff

...according to a Chinese aphorism, at any rate.

The typical North Fultonite is adrift upon a sea of foreclosures and bank failures, a “Hobson’s choice” gubernatorial run-off, static or declining property values, rising unemployment, and the ranting of diametrically opposed camps of self-interested doomsayers:  the very “market prophets” who, while unable to foresee current depression, have since taken to verbal fisticuffs over the number of inflationary/deflationary angels the head of a “floating” pin can accommodate.

Given these irresistible, presumably causeless forces; marching in grim array against (and posing an existential threat to) the immovable object of his talk-radio conservatism and “rugged individualism,” one hesitates to deride him for dismissing an adage the world’s oldest continuous civilization (and fastest-rising economic power) has taken for granted since 1700 B.C.  His physical capital on the verge of exhaustion, he can hardly be faulted for selling his “intellectual capital” short, especially when the economic pundits have abruptly reversed themselves by declaring it a myth -- and have condemned Locke and Smith to outer darkness whilst canonizing Keynes and Greenspan.

Hankering after a guaranteed return on his investment (and perhaps misinterpreting Legendre’s cry of “Laissez nous faire!” in the process), he’s equally indifferent to past and present; principle and pragmatism.  When frightened, he stakes his liberty against promises of security as readily as a floozy flips her skirt for a line of “stepped” cocaine.

Suffice to say that he has quite a bit on what passes for his mind nowadays -- and pity him for it. St. Peter once observed that the Lord is no respecter of persons, and empirical observation demonstrates that circumstance is no respecter of incapacity or self-delusion.  When times get tough, the ersatz tough gets going -- to the first source of relief that reduces him to dependency whilst reinforcing the egoistic elements of his contradictory self-image. When, for example, Clinton occupied the Oval Office, our ostensible lean wolf rightly considered “Know Your Customer” an egregious violation of his privacy. When, on the other hand, Bush demanded “Total Information Awareness,” the same creature shape-shifted into a fat dog and exposed his belly without a whimper of protest.

If it seems odd that David Belle Isle would serve as a bridge between past and present, between ancient China and modern America; it’s only because truth transcends time and culture. I know him only by his voting record and a handshake (as he’s stepped down from the Alpharetta City Council and lost the D-56 Republican primary as well, endorsing him would be pointless), but his voting against Obama’s stimulus funds bespoke a fundamental understanding of the market (whether free or mixed) as a product of human activity; and, more importantly, of human nature.

In this reporter’s opinion, the Alpharetta City Council leads the North Fulton pack in terms of sound judgment and true fiscal conservatism. Rightly suspicious of big government, they’ve been consistent members in good standing of the “reality-based community.”

Until now.

Like any sentient North Fultonite, I’m aware of the crime problem along North Point Parkway -- probably more so than most. I’ve lived in Roswell since 1976. When I graduated high school in ‘85, Encore Parkway was simply “the Make-Out Bridge”: an overpass that terminated in a dirt road. Aside from being a haven for teenyboppers wanting to proof-test what they’d learned in RYDE and Sex Ed (and an easy means of ingress/egress for good ol’ boys to whom Deer Season was an inconvenient abstraction), it served no purpose. This is to say that even then, it was a Mecca of petty vice: underage drinking, poaching, simple possession, slap-and-tickle, and (perhaps worst of all) not giving a rodent’s posterior whether the Hornets beat the Eagles or vice versa.

Time and progress, though, have taken their toll. The woods have given way to strip malls and malls- proper, and high school potheads and lotharios have given way to carjackers, muggers, purse snatchers, smash-and-grab men, and -- apparently -- Osama bin Laden. Yes, you read that correctly.

On Tuesday, with no public comment, the Alpharetta City Council unanimously voted to accept a $140,131 grant from the DHS, to the end of placing 19 surveillance cameras along North Point Parkway. While saluting their solid (if belated) grasp of the obvious, one wonders why a “conservative” city accepts funds from an arguably unnecessary, cabinet-level department.

North Point Parkway is a “scumbag-friendly” environment -- end of story. The cameras are, in Councilman DeRito’s words, “an excellent practical step to ensure the safety of people who pass through.”  Claiming otherwise is sheer idiocy. Equating crimes of opportunity (Mayor Letchas, to his credit, suggested common sense as a preventive measure) with terrorism, though, is equally foolish and dangerously short-sighted. Expecting the federal government to solve municipal problems (thereby blurring the lines that define its stated purpose) flies in the face of logic and human history.

In expanding an already distant, largely indifferent entity’s power -- without demanding a commensurate increase in accountability -- Alpharetta may very well have become party to a Faustian bargain.  Beyond demolishing the system of checks and balances, the council’s decision undermines a core principle of free enterprise by turning federal revenues, derived from individual and corporate taxes, into a spoils system. Why should a Kennesaw business owner foot the bill for an Alpharetta-based competitor’s security? And why should a Louisiana shrimper subsidize either?

Genuine independence often requires making the best of a bad situation with our own resources. Whether we beg, borrow, or steal; the piper will be paid, and the Devil will claim his due -- with interest, as often as not. The medium of exchange may (and often does) vary, but the nature of debt is immutable. Does this kind of open-ended obligation behoove any of us in the long run? I think the question answers itself.

Nothing is free -- especially freedom.